A 7-Step Process To Rapidly Change Limiting Beliefs

The Deep Dive By Tony Wang

As a coach, one of the deepest levels of service you can provide clients is helping them shift their limiting beliefs to align with what they want. Whether they know it or not, it’s one of the reasons they’ve decided to work with you! They’re looking to gain new perspectives they weren’t able to see before. 

If you neglect this, you can show your client the world’s best strategies and tactics, but they’ll struggle with implementing, which will block them from getting results. And that impacts your customer success and reputation as a coach.

And when you master this, you can help clients get results very quickly. You’ll get raving clients who will happily send you referrals. And not only that, you’ll be able to uncover and upgrade your own limiting beliefs to more easily create the business and life you desire. 

So in this article, you’ll learn a simple framework to create belief change in yourself and your clients. I believe that anyone who does this level of deep transformational work with clients needs to have experience doing it on themselves. So for the purpose of this article, I’ll be sharing how to apply this to your own situation. 

The Cause Of Limiting Beliefs Is Not What You Think

My definition of a limiting belief is a thought from a certain point of view (an “identity”) that is counter to who you want to be.

I know that’s probably different from the definition you’re familiar with, so here’s an example: 

Let’s say you have a belief, “It’s hard for me to attract my ideal clients”.

If you were to ask “what  type of person experiences this reality” your answer could be something like “a person who struggles”. This is the underlying identity. 

Now this identity is counter to the identity you prefer, which is “a successful coach”.

Following me so far?

This gap between your desired identity and current identity creates tension. It makes you feel stressed or stuck. When you resolve this tension, you can shift out of the limiting identity and into your preferred one. This is the deepest level of belief change possible because we don’t try to convince your mind whether or not a thought is true. Instead we change the underlying identity (who you think you are). As a result, we can transform dozens of limiting beliefs all at once.

The Vicious Cycle Of How Negative Identities Creates Undesired Realities 

Limiting identities create negative thoughts and feelings.

Negative thoughts and feelings created ineffective actions (or no action)

Ineffective actions create an undesired reality 

Undesired reality triggers limiting identities 

Trigger → Limiting Identity → Negative Thoughts/Feelings → Ineffective Actions → Undesired Reality → Trigger 

Here’s an example:

• Trigger: You check your CRM and see no new leads for days

• Limiting Identity: You unconsciously assume the identity of an “defeated person” 

• Negative Thoughts/Feelings/Beliefs: As a “defeated person”, you start to feel frustrated and discouraged. You start having thoughts about how hard it is, how nothing works for you and so on 

• Ineffective actions: Now you way are less motivated to take action to get new clients 

• Undesired reality: You have no new clients 

Using this model, you can see that limiting beliefs are only a part of the picture. The root cause is your identities, the source of your thoughts, feelings and beliefs. 

If you’ve struggled with belief change in the past (either yourself or your clients), then this is likely why. If you don’t address the underlying identities, belief change at the thought and emotional level is superficial.

Plus, Identity change can seem scary. That’s because identities keep us safe and provide guidelines on how to think, feel and act. 

For instance, the way you are around your parents is different from the way you are around your partner. And that’s different from the way you are around your clients.

You have many slightly different “personalities” which are unconsciously based on your intentions and needs (which are also unconscious for the most part). Often, these intentions are to keep you safe or feel a certain way. And they may be counter to other goals like building your dream business.

When you start to become aware of this, you can start to recognize the identities you assume automatically. From there, you can drop the identities that aren’t needed anymore, and take on new empowering identities. This creates specific thoughts and feelings, which results in positive actions. Those positive actions end up creating a reality you desire. 

Releasing limiting identities is easier than you might think. Below is a simple-yet-proven process that’s worked for hundreds of people in our private coaching. You just need an open mind and willingness to explore the inner workings of your mind.

The 7 Step Process To Shift Out of Disempowering Identities 

1. Feel your problem or limiting belief (ie. I’m not getting enough clients)

2. Ask yourself, what type of person is experiencing this problem? Take a moment to FEEL the identity that comes up naturally. Don’t overthink or analyze this. But just pose the question and feel your answer. Just describe what identity comes up as best as you can. (ie. a person who doesn’t want to put themselves out there)

3. Assume the point of view of that identity. Feel your goal or intention. Look through the eyes of the identity that came up, and feel your goal. What do you want or need? (ie. To feel safe and avoid being judged)

4. Feel your goal. What comes up now? Now, just place your attention on that goal that came up. Feel into it and notice what comes up, positive, neutral or negative. (ie. A feeling of fear)

5. Repeat steps 2-4 until no more goals come up

6. Feel your problem/belief again and check what’s left of it. When you do this successfully, you’ll notice that you can’t feel your starting problem or belief anymore or it’s reduced in intensity. While nothing has changed externally, a lot will have shifted internally. That’s because you’ll have released limiting identities that used to block you

7. What is 1 action (big or small) that you can take? When can you commit to doing it? This is an integration question to help you bring these changes into your physical reality. You simply pick 1 thing you can do to get you closer to your goal. (ie. Try a new content format for social media).

This process usually takes anywhere between 5-30 minutes. 

You’re just cycling through the same 3 questions to remove the various layers of the issue. Yes, it’s repetitive, but it’s not boring. If you do it from a place of honesty and curiosity, you’ll gain a lot of insights into your own mind and patterns. 

I recommend you try this on yourself before helping others with it. You’ll be surprised at what’s possible with this simple 7-question process. Not only can you quickly shift limiting beliefs, but also resolve fears, phobias, anxieties and deeper emotional challenges that would take weeks or months with regular therapies.  

Thanks for reading and I wish you continued growth and success on your journey.